- Directed by Kevin Lewis
- Written by G. O. Parsons
- Stars Nicolas Cage, Emily Tosta, Beth Grant, Ric Reitz
- Run Time: 1 Hour, 28 Minutes
- Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0v27rfaoB2Y
Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone
This was entertaining and strange, with Nicolas Cage playing a strong, very silent type. He doesn’t say a word throughout the whole movie. The practical effects are great with lots of gore, the story is decent, and we’d recommend it.
Spoilery Synopsis
We get old video clips of animatronic creatures as a couple, covered in blood, runs from something terrifying. Something kills them both with a lot of blood. Credits roll as we watch a car driving too fast and get four flat tires all at once. The tow truck driver says it was a kids’ prank as they drive into the small town of Hayes.
We cut to a girl about to set fire to Willy’s Wonderland, but just before she lights it, the sheriff shows up. She’s Liv, and when she sees the stranger with the flat tire, she likes him. The tow truck guy says it’ll be $1000 cash in advance to fix the car, but his credit card machines are down. He knows a guy that’ll give him a job that pays cash.
Tex is the owner of the long-closed Willy’s Wonderland, and he offers to pay for the car to be fixed if the man stays inside and cleans overnight. It’s really obviously a sketchy deal, but the new “Janitor” doesn’t have much choice. Tex plays a video demonstrating what Willy’s used to be like. It’s essentially Chuck E. Cheese. The place was shut down due to lawsuits from kids crawling on the animatronics and getting hurt. Tex then leaves, padlocking the janitor inside.
Liv’s friends come to free her from the sheriff’s handcuffs, and Kathy picks the lock. She wants to “do what’s right” and burn Willy’s to the ground, but she wonders about that guy that Tex suckered into staying inside. Her “gang” wants revenge for all the missing people and dead kids.
At Willy’s the janitor starts cleaning and tidying up the long-abandoned mess. We see some of the animatronic creatures moving behind him, but only a little. Then, the mechanical Ozzie the Ostrich says “I’m gonna feed on your face” and bites him. There’s a ridiculous battle as the janitor beats it to death and pulls its mechanical spine out. He tries to take it out to the trash, and that’s when he realizes he’s locked in. He’s got a timer on his watch that goes off every hour reminding him to drink his “Punch Pop” energy drink.
The janitor gets back to work cleaning the restrooms when all the animatronics activate and start singing “It’s Your Birthday.” Gus the Gorilla attacks, and the janitor kills him with a plunger. He takes a long, hard look at the other characters before stopping for another energy drink and getting back to work cleaning.
Liv and her people arrive outside Willy’s Wonderland, and they pour gas all around the outside of the building. They’re ready to light the place up, but Liv insists that they let the man inside out. She crawls in through the air ducts, which seem to be the only clean place in the building. She’s pursued by Arty the Alligator and Siren Sara. Liv tells the janitor that he needs to leave, but he just walks away. The roof collapses, and all Liv’s friends fall inside too.
Liv explains to the janitor that he’s here to be a human sacrifice, and the trick with the flat tires is a regular thing. The place was built by a serial killer who lured and killed entire families there. The owner and his serial killer friends did a Satanic ritual to transfer their souls into the animatronic animals.
Willy the Weasel sings a song as Knighty Knight stabs Aaron. The janitor drinks more Power Punch and plays pinball as things get dangerous with the others. Kathy and Bob separate from the others, and they start having sex. Chris calls the sheriff and tells her what’s going on; she hangs up on him. “People made their beds; they gotta lie in them.” She relents and takes Deputy Evan to Willy’s.
The janitor stops playing pinball long enough to wreck Knighty Knight. In the next room, Arty the Alligator kills Bob and Kathy while Siren Sara finishes off Dan. The janitor breaks down the door and tears Arty’s face off. Cammy the Chameleon talks to Chris, trying to convince him that she’s not like the others. She’s not different from the others.
The sheriff tells Evan about Willy, and he thinks she’s joking. She tells him the history of the cursed place. The machines were getting out killing people, even children, randomly around town. They cut a deal and started offering them morally questionable people and travelers to eat if they would leave the townsfolk alone. This has been going on for a long time. Liv was one of the few who survived a night in the building as a child and the sheriff took her in.
The janitor is just about to kill Cammy the Chameleon, but he has to stop for another Punch Pop drink, so he just leaves Liv to deal with it. After a drink and a go at pinball, he comes back to continue the job.
The sheriff arrives, and she points her gun at the janitor. She orders Evan to handcuff the janitor and then they, along with Liv, leave him inside. Liv works on talking to Evan in the car about going back. Evan decides to go back, but he’s attacked by Tito the Turtle. Liv beats him to death with an unloaded shotgun.
Cammy and Sara walk in, and they’re ready to finish off the janitor. The handcuffs don’t slow him down much. He then goes back to work cleaning after disposing of the mechanical and human bodies. Only Willy himself is left on the stage. The sheriff returns and complains about how they had a good thing going, and the janitor notices that Willy’s not on the stage anymore. Willy shows up and violently kills the sheriff.
Willy turns against the janitor and claws him up pretty well before dumping him into the ball pit. The janitor isn’t about to give up that easily. He packs up his remaining Power Punch cans and goes after the bug weasel. The epic music plays as the two do battle: claws versus a bag of sodas. The janitor eventually rips off Willy’s head.
Tex and the tow truck driver bring the janitor’s car to the parking lot. We see Siren Sara crawling out of the dumpster. Inside, the janitor has the place looking clean and good as new. The janitor takes his keys from Tex, who looks astounded. Liv meets the janitor outside the car and gets in with him.
Tex and the tow truck driver come out, glad that their problems are over. “It’s actually over!” They get into Tex’s car– which Sara immediately blows up.
The janitor and Liv drive away. He gives her a can of his drink, and they run down Tito the Turtle on the way out of town.
Commentary
Nic Cage doesn’t say a word throughout. I gotta wonder what the story behind that was. His weird behavior and addiction to Punch Pops is really weird and fun. Each time he kills a monster, he puts on a clean uniform, which is hilarious.
It’s supposedly not an adaptation of “Five Nights at Freddy’s,” but it’s pretty close to the same basic idea. It’s also strikingly similar to the “Banana Splits” Movie.
It’s good. It’s weird. It’s funny in all the right places.