Director: Thomas J. Churchill
Writer: Thomas J. Churchill
Stars: Yan Birch, Keavy Bradley, Ashley Cacho
Run Time: 1 hour, 33 Minutes
Link: https://amzn.to/3kfdyFK
Synopsis
Lana talks to Robbie’s dead body at the Miller Funeral Home. She’s the last one there before they cart him off to the burial site. She nervously drops her phone in the toilet. She takes too long in the bathroom and gets locked in after everyone else has left– except she sees herself outside, getting into the car and heading off to the funeral. She then sees Robbie standing there, who says, “Stay with me, forever!” He then lunges at her with his face rotting off. Credits roll. Lana is never seen again.
A couple has broken into the Miller Funeral Home. The man gets beaten to death with a hammer, while the girl appears to be attacked by a vampire.
Christina is researching something. A mysterious man in a big house invites a group to visit. He’s got room for all of them. They all show up in one big group to interview Mr. Vincent Miller, the owner of the big house and funeral home next door. The photographer gets off the train at the station that has “Amityville” CGI-lettered on the wall, in what is probably the only Amityville reference in the film.
They all sit down to dinner. The pale-faced Vincent doesn’t eat or drink. Except for something red out of a mug. As Vincent explains the house rules, they see weird black lines on the wall and hear a deep voice talking to each of them. He says the basement and funeral parlor are off limits. And cell phones don’t work but feel free to use the land line.
“I like how everything looks old and dated,” says one of the crew. It’s huge and beautiful and Vincent says it was an orphanage once and a headquarters for bootleggers. They take a tour, as it has some vague connection to the Civil War, and Vincent has a family history he wants to share. Vincent is creepy, and the tour is boring. Otis goes outside to smoke, and he starts seeing Civil War ghosts. Then they see him, and things get bloody.
We get flashes of Vincent biting the housekeeper while the black fines crawl around on the walls behind him. Lexi dreams that Vincent kills her, but it’s a just a dream. A couple folks dream they get killed in their bedroom.
Eventually, they get started with the interview the next night. Vincent starts talking about the history of his family. His voice doesn’t go onto the recorder. Christine’s voice is fine, but it just will not pick up Vincent. He’s picking up other voices and noise, but no one else can hear anything special. None of the video shows him either.
Cosmo the cameraman goes into the basement and sees bad things. He’s looking for evidence of whatever happened to Lana.
Miller claims “his great-grandfather” was an associate of John Wilkes Booth, and he was the mastermind behind the killing. The “Great-Grandfather” also stole all the gold that was to be paid to the assassins. The great-grandfather made a deal that would protect him “for all eternity.” He still has the gold. Cosmo notices that Vincent doesn’t show up in the mirror, so he calls the police.
They still can’t figure out the missing video and audio recordings. Vincent explains that it’s not the equipment, it’s a curse. Cosmo guesses that the “great-grandfather” was really this Vincent. Meanwhile, various people in the crew die bloody deaths. Cosmo’s cop friends arrive, but the crazy surgeon in the basement makes quick work of them.
Christine fights with Vincent, stabbing him with garden tools, which does nothing but slow him down a little. Meanwhile Nancy, Christina’s sister, does battle with the surgeon. Nancy gets out the front door and runs to the Hearse driver, who takes her right back to the funeral home.
Commentary
I’m past the point of complaining about films using the word “Amityville” to add some level of class to their films, but once again, this has nothing to do with the famous haunted house. Nothing at all.
It’s professionally shot, well-lit, and looks good, so this is already above the level of most indie films, but the story is so slow-paced that I kept looking at my phone throughout. The acting is also consistently very good from a cast who weren’t all super experienced. I think a big problem is that we learn that Vincent is a vampire very early in the film, and that kills a bunch of the mystery and suspense.
There are some good aspects to the film, but there’s a lot left unexplained.