- Directed by Michael Mohan
- Written by Andrew Lobel
- Stars Sydney Sweeney, Alvaro Morte, Simona Tabasco
- Run Time: 1 Hour, 29 Minutes
- Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewxS9Z-XXYo
Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone
This is one with a slow start, an almost disappointing first half, that picks up abruptly with a strong finish. Sydney Sweeney is excellent in the lead role. We ended up liking it quite a bit and would give it a thumbs up.
Spoilery Synopsis
A nun prays and then sneaks around after dark. She goes into the sleeping priest’s room and steals his keys. Keys in hand, she makes a run for it, but she has trouble getting the big chains off the front gate. As she struggles with the lock, four hooded figures come out of the convent behind her and break her leg. She passes out from the pain, but when she awakens, she’s been buried alive in a coffin. Credits roll and she screams and pounds in the dark.
Sister Cecilia is an American who has come to Italy to become a nun. The convent bought her ticket, and the immigration people think that’s strange. A priest comes to pick her up and drive her to the convent. He drives her through the big gates we saw earlier.
Sister Isabelle speaks English, and she’s clearly afraid of the Mother Superior at “Our Sister of Sorrows.” It’s basically an end of life facility where they take care of aged and terminally ill nuns. She explains the place was built over some old catacombs. There’s one nun dying of cancer, and another who’s got dementia really bad and bites people. Isabelle is grouchy and not friendly at all; “You can still not take your vows,” she warns. Sister Gwen barges in and wants to talk to Cecilia about America; she seems much nicer than Isabelle.
Evening comes, and it’s time for Cecilia to take her vows. Father Tedeschi is there, and he seems very friendly. That goes well, and there’s a reception afterward. Tedeschi makes small talk about how he went to school to be a biologist. Cecilia says there’s nothing like all this back in the States.
Mother Superior shows Cecilia a big nail, supposedly from the crucifixion. She faints and drops it, which means she has to go to confession. She has a nightmare about those hooded figures we saw earlier, and they stab her. The next morning, Mother Superior gives all the new nuns a pep talk. We get a “settling in” montage.
Late one night, a crazy old nun comes into Cecilia’s room and cuts off a bit of her hair. In the morning, she throws up and sees the doctor. Afterward, she’s brought in before Tedeschi and the cardinal, who tell her that she’s pregnant, breaking her vow of chastity. She says she’s never been with a man before– ever. The doctor confirms that she was a virgin when she got there and there haven’t been any visitors. It’s a miracle, so now she gets to wear the fancy robes!
Months later, she vomits up a tooth. When she goes to dinner, all of the other nuns stand up in respect. Later, she’s attacked in the bathtub by Isabelle. “It was supposed to be me! They have to try again with me!”
Cecilia wants to go to a real hospital, but both Father Tedeschi and Dr. Gallo say no. She keeps seeing people with red faces under their robes. Sister Isabelle jumps off the roof to her death, and she’s a mess. Sister Gwen warns Cecilia about the place, but Cecilia already knows. Then the priests take her away.
At night, Cecilia finds a note written on the wall of her room behind a painting; it’s another warning. She then goes to the office and reads her own file, even going back to when she had a near-death accident as a child. She hears screaming outside and finds several of the red-mask people cutting out Gwen’s tongue. She gets a jump scare from that crazy old nun who cut her hair earlier; she’s made a special cross for Cecilia and says “No one ever leaves here.”
In the morning, everyone hears screaming; Cecilia is in great pain with lots of blood, something is wrong with the baby. Tedeschi puts her in the car and heads to the hospital. Back at the convent one old nun finds a dead chicken under Cecilia’s bed; she faked the problem. Tedeschi gets a call on his cell phone, and turns around, almost within sight of the town.
Returning to the convent, Tedeschi explains things to Cecilia about the blessed nail. It literally was from the crucifixion of Christ. They found blood and tissue on it, and they used it to impregnate Cecilia; this old convent has a cloning lab, and they’ve impregnated Cecilia with a Jesus clone. Tedeschi went to school for biology, and he was thrown out for the ethics of his experiments. The church wasn’t so squeamish. He’s been trying for twenty years, and this is the first time it “took.”
“May you never stray again,” he says as he brands burning crosses on the bottoms of her feet. She’s definitely a prisoner now. In the morning, she peels off one of her loose fingernails; it’s doing something to her.
Time passes, and the baby has gotten bigger. Cecilia beats a nun to death with a metal cross but on her way out, her water breaks. Then she strangles the cardinal with his own rosary. She goes to the cloning lab and pours alcohol all over. Tedeschi comes in. “If you die, we’ll find another.” She burns him to death too. No, he’s not dead after all, so she runs downstairs into the catacombs.
After a quick chase in the tunnels, the scorched priest grabs her and cuts into Cecilia’s belly. Before he can do too much damage, she stabs him in the neck with the magic nail. She crawls through a hole in the wall, and she’s outside the convent.
She screams and screams as she gives birth. She looks down at the baby, and it ain’t Jesus. We don’t get a good look at it, but it isn’t right. It growls at her. She picks up a big rock and smashes it.
Commentary
You could probably just show us what life in a nunnery is really like; that’d be plenty horrific all by itself.
The first hour is predictable and even a little boring. Once the priest explains what’s really going on it gets weird. Wow, does it get weird.
It’s very slow-moving, especially in the beginning, but it ends well. OK, it doesn’t end well, but it’s entertaining.
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