- Directed by Neil LaBute
- Written by Neil LaBute
- Stars Kate Bosworth, Justin Long, Gia Crovatin
- Run Time: 1 Hour, 28 Minutes
- Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZYLV0FgYgk
Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone
It’s well made, but not that interesting. The cast is excellent, and so is the setting. You suspect right from the beginning where things are heading. It drags on a bit too long getting to a climax.
Synopsis
“Once upon a time…”
Mina takes Hap home after their date, and she lives way out in the middle of nowhere. He’s a “city guy” and he’s a little creeped out by the country darkness. She invites him in, and he’s all awkward about it. Her house looks more like a castle than a house.
They step inside and almost immediately, the power goes out. Hap thinks he sees someone in the mirror, but when he looks again, there’s no one there. She twists his words, teases and torments him with what he says, but finally they sit together on the couch.
Mina says that her family has several of these estates scattered around through the country. While she’s gone getting drinks, he calls a friend to brag, and she overhears just enough to ask if he’s married. He admits that they’re legally separated.
Finally, they get down to business kissing, and she talks about how strong he is, keeping himself young. He says he could do anything he wanted to her way out here in the country; anything he wanted. Just as things start getting serious, he hears someone else in the house. About this time, they remember that they don’t even know each other’s names.
As Mina pulls Hap’s pants down around his knees, Mina’s sister Lucy walks in. Lucy and Hap talk about their fathers. Suddenly, the power comes back on. The sisters go into the kitchen, and Hap goes to sleep.
Hap wakes up in a dark cave, tied to a chair. He screams and struggles for a while until he sees someone there with him, but they vanish. He gets himself untied eventually. The tunnels he’s in are extensive; he finds a huge mound of old shoes. He runs around in the dark until he breaks his leg.
And then he wakes up back in the living room. He was just dreaming. Lucy is honest and very direct, and more than a little weird. She offers to give him a tour of the house. They talk for a while, and she seems to like him as well.
Mina returns with drinks, and Lucy says she’ll tell Hap a ghost story if tells one first. Hap starts to think about a three-way, and the girls don’t say anything to dissuade him, so he plays along.
Hap’s too drunk to really make up a story, so he basically narrates what his evening has been like. At the end of the story, he says he’ll never be afraid again for the rest of his life, and then they all get together and have sex, at least in his story.
The girls are disappointed– they wanted a ghost story. Lucy tells a story next. Her story is less fun than his– a girl was beaten and gang raped, but then a father and his two daughters nursed her back to health, drop-by-drop. Together, the family took revenge on the men who hurt her one by one. The story moves into the girl tying men up in caves, which reminds Hap of his dream. She talks about the family luring in victims to toy with as they tear them apart, piece-by-piece. Three sisters of the undead; their story never ends.
Hap doesn’t find the story amusing. Suddenly, Nora, the third sister, pops in. “You still don’t understand what’s happening here,” Mina asks. He starts getting annoyed and defensive. Then he turns nasty and puts his coat on to leave. He finds the door is locked.
He goes outside, and Mina is there waiting for him. She bites his throat out. The three sisters drain him dry.
“…and they all lived happily ever after.”
Commentary
The first half is pure awkward talking about an awkward date. If cringey, first-date awkwardness is scary, then this movie is terrifying. It goes on way too long, and after the first hour, it started to grate.
We assumed from the beginning, from the movie poster and the fact the two women are named Mina and Lucy that this was a vampire movie. Kevin said after an hour that it felt like they were just playing with their food.
We mostly knew where it was going from the beginning, but we were hoping for a twist or surprise. Maybe he would turn out to be the vampire or something, but no. There are only a couple of sets and only four actors; special effects are nonexistent. It feels a lot like a stage play. The production values are great, it’s just nothing but talk until the final gore shot.