- Directed by Anne Fletcher
- Written by Jen D’Angelo, David Kirschner, Blake Harris
- Stars Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker, Kathy Najimy
- Run Time: 1 Hour, 43 Minutes
- Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecJRvz9nk-U
Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone
This one very much seems like a kid’s movie. It’s silly and funny and well made. But not at all scary. And not very entertaining to us adult horror guys.
Synopsis
A crow flies through Salem of 1653. An angry woman storms through town; it’s Winnifred Sanderson. She and her sisters are really young, and they’re not quite witches yet. Apparently they’ve invented a magical formula that made Jello. Winnifred is angry because she’s getting older and must marry soon. It’s Winnie’s birthday, and the other two girls got her a big spider.
There’s a knock at the door, and it’s the reverend insisting she marry John Pritchard. John doesn’t want to marry her either, she’s ugly and unpleasant. The reverend banishes Winnie from Salem forever. Just Winnie; Sarah and Mary are going to be adopted. The three sisters create a distraction and run for the Forbidden Wood.
Night falls, and they hear singing. A witch flies in; “You are different from the other children I’ve eaten.” She says that these woods are where witches go to recharge themselves. She gives them her book of spells. The three girls sneak back into town and read the spells in the book. They get their revenge. Credits roll.
In the present day, it’s Halloween. It’s also Becca’s birthday. She and her friends Izzy and Cassie hang out every year, but not this year. The three have a reputation for doing “witch stuff.” Cassie’s boyfriend Mike is an idiot, and he lets it slip that there’a a party tonight at Cassie’s house. Cassie’s father is the town’s mayor, and he’s descended from Reverend Traske from the Salem days. He’s really weird, like a father in a Disney show.
Becca and Izzy go to the magic shop, where Gilbert tells the story of the Sanderson Sisters. He’s got their book in a display case “to keep the book from getting out.” He explains that if a virgin lights the black candle on Halloween, the sisters would return and wreak their vengeance. Some swear that the sisters returned back 29 years ago, but the candle only brings them back for one night. Gilbert is weird too, like an adult in a Disney show. He gives them a black candle. He also gives them some Angelica leaves, which removes curses.
Becca and Izzy go out into the woods to do their usual ritual. They light the candle magically, and they’re both surprised. Suddenly, the three sisters appear, singing “The Witches Are Back.” If they want to live past sunrise, they have to brew the potion and steal their souls. Winnifred calls the book, but the book is locked up.
The two girls convince the witches they can help them buy potions. They go to the local Walgreens. They all drink some face cream. Then the three sisters run into three teens who are cosplaying as them. The witches figure out that they’ve been tricked, but the girls run away. They steal a broom, a Swiffer, and a pair of Roombas to fly away on.
Izzy and Becca go back to Gilbert’s and check out the book, which is awake now. He knew what the candle would do, and he gave it to them as a trick. He wanted the Sanderson Sisters to come back. The sisters come in since this used to be their home. They throw the two girls into the dungeon as Gilbert tells them that he saw the witches 29 years ago when the sun came up.
Mary finds a flier for the mayor, and they think it’s the Reverend again. Winnie decides to do the Magicae Maximae, the power spell that they promised the first witch they’d never do. The book doesn’t like that idea, but they force the issue. They order Gilbert to get the ingredients they need while they go off to get the blood of the mayor.
Gilbert goes to the cemetery to dig up Billy Butcherson, a zombie. Billy agrees to help Gilbert to kill Winnifred. Back in the dungeon, the two girls find a way to escape. They call the mayor and warn him about Cassie’s party at his house. At the town’s festival, the sisters get up on stage and do their act– but they don’t win. Half the town is dressed up like the legendary characters. This ends in a musical number “One Way or Another,” as they enchant most of the populace to chase down the mayor.
Becca and Izzy go to Cassie’s house, but the mayor has gone back to the festival by this point. The witches break in and encounter Siri, which goes badly. The three witches are trapped by the three girls who make a salt ring around them. Meanwhile, Gilbert steals Billy’s head, but the body tries to pursue.
Cassie and Mike confront Becca and Izzy about their spell. The mayor goes home and opens the garage, which is where the witches are trapped. He admires their costumes. Mary’s Roombas come to the rescue by sucking up all the salt.
The witches fly over and grab Cassie. Becca almost shoots them with a spell, but it doesn’t work. Gilbert takes all the assembled ingredients to the woods and waits for the witches. The witches shoo Gilbert away and start their power spell. Can Becca’s magic save Cassie?
Once Sarah and Mary figure out that their power has been enhanced, they start arguing with Winnie. Becca convinces the book to go with her and abandon Winnie.
The witches corner the three girls and start shooting, but Becca shares her power and defends them with a magic shield. Winnie insists that she’s the most powerful witch ever, and her sisters don’t agree.
The witches decide to complete the spell without the book. They do their final incantation. All powerful, the witches confront the three girls. They didn’t read the warning in the book; the power spell takes what you value the most. Sarah and Mary start to dissolve. Winnie freaks out and asks the book to undo what she’s done.
The book opens up for Becca, and she sees a spell inside that does a reuniting. Becca reads the spell. It doesn’t bring the two back, it sends Winnie to them. Winnie starts to dissolve, but she’s OK with that now.
Gilbert and Billy’s headless body charge to the rescue, but everything’s over by this time. Billy puts his head back on and dissolves as well. Happy endings all around.
Commentary
I have to admit; I’d not seen the original Hocus Pocus until we watched it for the podcast a year or two ago. As an adult, I think I missed the appeal that the film had to so many younger people. I don’t remember it being this silly either– there’s a lot of comedy here. I suspect the biggest fans of the original are in their 40s now, and this is just a pretty childish Disney show.
The production values are excellent, the acting is… appropriate, if not always good. The three young actresses playing the witch trio when they were young really had it down. The special effects are great. Overall, though, I was pretty bored throughout. It’s a kid’s movie.